Tonight I ponder: Does declaring a day "bad" or "off" destine it to be so?
Today, after plaguing people at work incessantly with mistakes and forgetfulness that only added to their work loads, after tripping over boxes and platforms and things I normally walk around with ease, I answered the above question at least in part with, "Staying upbeat can't overcome every problem." Mind-numbing exhaustion still numbs the mind, low-blood sugar still slows and weakens, and chronic clumsiness still results in bruises and flaming cheeks, no matter how wide the smile or how loud the declarations of "My day is getting better by the minute." A friend recently observed to me, "You're not very kind to yourself." Often I associate such simple things as a long soak in the tub or an extra long sleep or a taste of chocolate as selfish things I must pay a fair amount of guilt for if I indulge in, but perhaps, being kind to yourself isn't the same as overindulgence, selfishness, or pride. It's treating the body and life God gave you with a fair amount of respect for its human needs.
Recently, I saw a Facebook friend's post on her guilt over getting a haircut now and then and recalled all the times I'd thought the same. Our bodies, the temple of God, should be cared for and presented well - part of finishing with excellence every day. On that thought, I leave you, Dear Reader, and off to bath and bed I go. Night night,
Blessings,
V
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Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Sticking
An unfortunate byproduct of my life as an MK (missionary kid) will likely be my companion to the grave: Inconsistency. In many areas of my being I would hope those who know me can look and say "She's reliable, trustworthy and honorable; a woman of her word." Along with my stubborn will comes a strong determination to do what must be done and do it right. But plenty of things about me change constantly, and much that I wish and want and hope for, quickly drops away. For me I suppose the question to ask is: "Is this a negative or positive trait?"
The root cause, from what I can tell, is years of my development spent frequently moving from place to place, meeting new people, seeing exciting places and things, working and growing and learning in ever-changing circumstances and surroundings. It was wonderful and never dull, at least for me. These experiences stretched and strengthened and challenged me in valuable ways, and I wouldn't trade a-one for anything. But every lifestyle has its cons, and one of the cons here is the above-listed weakness.
I tried, a few years back, to start using a mother's organizer book, complete with calendar, address book, and many categories, pockets, etc. for keeping all my stuff in one easy-to-access place. It was a fantastic resource and smart idea (someone gave it as a gift), but lasted all of about 6 months to a year. Then I set it down and have rarely picked it (or a similar resource) up again. So so often I hear an idea and even try it but rarely does the passion that carried me there, stick around for all that long. Of some things, important things, this is not true. And I think there's my answer. Maybe it's not so bad to have trouble sticking with a lot of resolutions, ideas and impulses, because ultimately, those things aren't all important to my existence. Maybe this trait helps the unimportant drop away, frequently decluttering my mind and leaving it free to absorb something new.
My desk at work is so clean! I love having a place for everything at work - life without clutter is heavenly! One of the drawbacks to clutter is, there's insufficient space remaining for what really matters.
Still, when considering such vital things as training and disciplining my children, balancing my checkbook, or studying to increase in wisdom, my weakness of perpetual inconsistency won't pass as an excuse. These are things that cannot afford to drop away or be cast down by the wayside. Along every stretch of my life road, identifying and sticking with priorities is vital to a healthy and purposeful journey.
My mind begins to muddle more with each minute spent awake. So, I go.
Blessings,
V
The root cause, from what I can tell, is years of my development spent frequently moving from place to place, meeting new people, seeing exciting places and things, working and growing and learning in ever-changing circumstances and surroundings. It was wonderful and never dull, at least for me. These experiences stretched and strengthened and challenged me in valuable ways, and I wouldn't trade a-one for anything. But every lifestyle has its cons, and one of the cons here is the above-listed weakness.
I tried, a few years back, to start using a mother's organizer book, complete with calendar, address book, and many categories, pockets, etc. for keeping all my stuff in one easy-to-access place. It was a fantastic resource and smart idea (someone gave it as a gift), but lasted all of about 6 months to a year. Then I set it down and have rarely picked it (or a similar resource) up again. So so often I hear an idea and even try it but rarely does the passion that carried me there, stick around for all that long. Of some things, important things, this is not true. And I think there's my answer. Maybe it's not so bad to have trouble sticking with a lot of resolutions, ideas and impulses, because ultimately, those things aren't all important to my existence. Maybe this trait helps the unimportant drop away, frequently decluttering my mind and leaving it free to absorb something new.
My desk at work is so clean! I love having a place for everything at work - life without clutter is heavenly! One of the drawbacks to clutter is, there's insufficient space remaining for what really matters.
Still, when considering such vital things as training and disciplining my children, balancing my checkbook, or studying to increase in wisdom, my weakness of perpetual inconsistency won't pass as an excuse. These are things that cannot afford to drop away or be cast down by the wayside. Along every stretch of my life road, identifying and sticking with priorities is vital to a healthy and purposeful journey.
My mind begins to muddle more with each minute spent awake. So, I go.
Blessings,
V
Monday, February 14, 2011
Smiling
Today toddled past my office door two adorable little blond girls (apparently sisters), grinning and starry-eyed. Above glowing cherub faces swung perfect ponytails, adorned with bows. Brief, their journey past my door yet tremendous, its effect. Such light encompassed me, in that otherwise darkened moment. A personal saying of mine: "Never trust someone who can't return a child's smile". My cheeks stretched and eyes crinkled. And all my problems momentarily melted away.
Today found me feeling a bit...unlovable. Ever taken a glance down or inward at yourself and, wagging your head, sighed hopelessly? Such was my experience, numerous times throughout the day. SO overweight. SO haggard, worn, and frumpy-looking. SO fatally flawed, or so I feel. But internal verbal punches won't solve those problems. Minute by minute, the reminder to stay in the present and out of my head will do more good than any amount of negativity, whether it be self-criticism or tearing down someone else, ever could.
Once again my writing's disjointed and tiresome and hard to decode. A long night with Kaylee struggling for comfort meant no sleep, followed by a long day muddles my mind and puffs my eyelids. So, goodnight, my dear readers. Today's encouragement: Smile at a kid, and live in the moment.
Much Love,
Blessings,
V
Today found me feeling a bit...unlovable. Ever taken a glance down or inward at yourself and, wagging your head, sighed hopelessly? Such was my experience, numerous times throughout the day. SO overweight. SO haggard, worn, and frumpy-looking. SO fatally flawed, or so I feel. But internal verbal punches won't solve those problems. Minute by minute, the reminder to stay in the present and out of my head will do more good than any amount of negativity, whether it be self-criticism or tearing down someone else, ever could.
Once again my writing's disjointed and tiresome and hard to decode. A long night with Kaylee struggling for comfort meant no sleep, followed by a long day muddles my mind and puffs my eyelids. So, goodnight, my dear readers. Today's encouragement: Smile at a kid, and live in the moment.
Much Love,
Blessings,
V
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Silently
Today I made the (if you'd like to call it that) mistake of setting the adorable picture I snapped outside this summer, of Kaylee grinning, on the side table in my office at work. Such a flood of motherly longing and stabs of pain enveloped me. Guilt over not getting much time with her threatened to prevail but I managed to silently regain composure with the reminder that she's in the best of hands...her Father and mine watches over her, and her childcare provider cares for her so lovingly. And the same for each of my children.
Frequently I hear complaints about the cold and after awhile just want to shout, "What does all this negativity and griping change? Smile! No matter how hot or cold, you're breathing, walking, healthy enough to get out, have a job (if a co-worker) and a vehicle (probably-if a customer), and I'm fairly sure you're not about to starve to death. Life's fairly good, isn't it?!" But my reindeer nose and ruddy cheeks surrounding silent, smiling lips will tell a sweeter story than such a rant ever could. My plucky Irish blood and Italian fury keep me warm enough. :) Silently I gaze into the stinging wind and grin. It's not so much snow as they said. I'm loved and know divine love. Life's great. I am so blessed.
Sorry this is so disjointed, but I'll post it as is because I must get to work.
Blessings,
V
Frequently I hear complaints about the cold and after awhile just want to shout, "What does all this negativity and griping change? Smile! No matter how hot or cold, you're breathing, walking, healthy enough to get out, have a job (if a co-worker) and a vehicle (probably-if a customer), and I'm fairly sure you're not about to starve to death. Life's fairly good, isn't it?!" But my reindeer nose and ruddy cheeks surrounding silent, smiling lips will tell a sweeter story than such a rant ever could. My plucky Irish blood and Italian fury keep me warm enough. :) Silently I gaze into the stinging wind and grin. It's not so much snow as they said. I'm loved and know divine love. Life's great. I am so blessed.
Sorry this is so disjointed, but I'll post it as is because I must get to work.
Blessings,
V
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Interrupted
Knee-deep drifts of sparkling, powdery snow have nearly every local Facebook friend on my list snapping pictures, complaining about harrowing hours of digging out vehicles, shoveling walks and freezing off their heinies, and marveling at this rarity in winters of late: the blizzard. Those octillions of unique snowflakes make gorgeous panoramic photos, but they're also the reason I've lost two days of pay and at the job I love, no less. Lest you think this is yet another whine or rant about the weather, read on. They're also the reason I helped my kids with a puzzle marathon, sat in on two family movie nights in a row (Last night: "Ice Princess," tonight: "Treasures in the Snow"), concocted highly-rated baked potato soup and eggs, tomatoes and rice, amongst other dishes, for my family, and had a heart-to-heart talk with my son on days I'd normally only get a rushed 2 1/2 - 3 hours with them. How unbelievably blessed I feel! I even had a chance to battle this cold I've been fighting with the parries and thrusts of vitamins and naps, neither of which I have time for (or am allowed to do, on the latter!) at work. I've given Mom a little break on household chores and worn my much-neglected 'round the house clothes.
So, what a gift from God, this massive interruption! Whether I'll be saying that tomorrow when I'm likely back at work and freezing in my lovely chilly office, remains to be seen, but if I'm not, pay me no mind. People are maddeningly fickle. Hope if you're a resident in warmer places, you're reading this in thanksgiving, enjoying all the pictures from afar. And if you're surrounded by (soon to be) -10 degree, frightful weather outside along with me, you'll find the blessings in your own life and turn into bed with a smile.
"For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper [in the thing] whereto I sent it." Isaiah 55:10-11
Blessings,
V
So, what a gift from God, this massive interruption! Whether I'll be saying that tomorrow when I'm likely back at work and freezing in my lovely chilly office, remains to be seen, but if I'm not, pay me no mind. People are maddeningly fickle. Hope if you're a resident in warmer places, you're reading this in thanksgiving, enjoying all the pictures from afar. And if you're surrounded by (soon to be) -10 degree, frightful weather outside along with me, you'll find the blessings in your own life and turn into bed with a smile.
"For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper [in the thing] whereto I sent it." Isaiah 55:10-11
Blessings,
V
Friday, January 28, 2011
Awake
Take a look at the beings surrounding you, if you will, and today, see how the love of Christ in you can make their lives better. Surely some word spoken from your lips or some smile in response to a frown, or some touch on the hand or arm or shoulder of a friend could enrich them. I speak to myself, really. It's not something that comes naturally from our flesh - our minds constantly wish to absorb and occupy themselves with our own problems, concerns, fears, etc.
But look outside and smile and let the Son shine out. My challenge to myself today. Join me if you like.
Blessings,
V
But look outside and smile and let the Son shine out. My challenge to myself today. Join me if you like.
Blessings,
V
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Observation
One of my favorite aspects of my new job is the endless opportunity to observe human behavior. Yesterday, I chatted for awhile, rather animatedly, with a customer - an aging farmer - about fish, ponds, breaking through ice, grandkids, weather, etc., while he waited for his wife to return. We'd been having a good ole, chuckle-filled time when his wife finally showed up, looking miffed and broody. Granted, anything could have just happened to create that mood, but my immediate assumption (always a mistake to make those, I know) was, she felt uncomfortable with a much younger woman chatting and laughing so comfortably with her husband. Of course, I can talk with anyone that way and there was no flirtatious element at all, but it took me several moments of chatting with her about her grandkids while I finished her transaction to lighten the mood again. Funny how territorial we all are, and quite often, threats only exist in our perception.
Being back in the public arena in this way and constantly taxing my brain has so enlivened and refreshed me. It's rejuvenating to touch the lives of others, to coax a smile from a glum countenance, to bear good news to someone expecting bad, to drop someone off in a better mood than I picked them up in, and just generally to be light and salt to the beings surging through my small space in the world.
Lunch ends again. Back to work - yay! :)
Blessings,
V
Being back in the public arena in this way and constantly taxing my brain has so enlivened and refreshed me. It's rejuvenating to touch the lives of others, to coax a smile from a glum countenance, to bear good news to someone expecting bad, to drop someone off in a better mood than I picked them up in, and just generally to be light and salt to the beings surging through my small space in the world.
Lunch ends again. Back to work - yay! :)
Blessings,
V
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